BLOND JOKES FOR TODAY
ASTROLOGY
Two blondes living in Arkansas were sitting on a bench
talking.......and one blonde says to the other:
"Which do you think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says:
"Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida.......?????
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely
if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would
get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
today you expect me to show it to you!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said he Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going
at night!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.
She
rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you
are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs,
and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that
one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard
of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HelOOOooo," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs.
