PhryDom

The dog story was very effective - probably a buch of guys looking for the wrong thing called. ( ha ha ha ).

Our local humane society tries hard - we have adopted pets from there before and we have donated to them as well.

NO PARENT LEFT BEHIND (sorry for the all caps - its the way I got it)

I PROMISE, YOU CANNOT READ THESE AND NOT LAUGH OUT LOUD! THESE ARE REAL NOTES WRITTEN BY PARENTS IN A TENNESSEE SCHOOL DISTRICT. (SPELLINGS HAVE BEEN LEFT INTACT.)

MY SON IS UNDER A DOCTOR'S CARE AND SHOULD NOT TAKE PE TODAY. PLEASE EXECUTE HIM.

PLEASE EXKUCE LISA FOR BEING ABSENT SHE WAS SICK AND I HAD HER SHOT.

DEAR SCHOOL: PLEASE ECSC's JOHN BEING ABSENT ON JAN. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 AND ALSO 33.

PLEASE EXCUSE GLORIA FROM JIM TODAY. SHE IS ADMINISTRATING.

PLEASE EXCUSE ROLAND FROM P.E. FOR A FEW DAYS. YESTERDAY HE FELL OUT OF A TREE AND MISPLACED HIS HIP.

JOHN HAS BEEN ABSENT BECAUSE HE HAD TWO TEETH TAKEN OUT OF HIS FACE.

CARLOS WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE WAS P! LAYING FOOTBALL. HE WAS HURT IN THE GROWING PART.

MEGAN COULD NOT COME TO SCHOOL TODAY BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN BOTHERED BY VERY CLOSE VEINS.

CHRIS WILL NOT BE IN SCHOOL CUS HE HAS AN ACRE IN HIS SIDE.

PLEASE EXCUSE RAY FRIDAY FROM SCHOOL. HE HAS VERY LOOSE VOWELS.

PLEASE EXCUSE PEDRO FROM BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD (DIAHRE, DYREA, DIREATHE), THE SHITS. [WORDS IN ( )'s WERE CROSSED OUT].

PLEASE EXCUSE TOMMY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD DIARRHEA, AND HIS BOOTS LEAK.

IRVING WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE MISSED HIS BUST.

PLEASE EXCUSE JIMMY FOR BEING. IT WAS HIS FATHER'S FAULT

KEPT BILLIE HOME BECAUSE SHE HAD TO GO CHRISTMAS SHOPPING BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT SIZE SHE WEAR.

PLEASE EXCUSE JENNIFER FOR MISSING SCHOOL YESTERDAY. WE FORGOT TO GET THE SUNDAY PAPER OFF THE PORCH, AND WHEN WE FOUND IT MONDAY. WE THOUGHT IT WAS SUNDAY.

SALLY WON'T BE IN SCHOOL A WEEK FROM FRIDAY. WE HAVE TO ATTEND HER FUNERAL.

MY DAUGHTER WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE SHE WAS TIRED. SHE SPENT A WEEKEND WITH THE MARINES.

PLEASE EXCUSE JASON FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD A COLD AND COULD NOT BREED WELL.

PLEASE EXCUSE MARY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. SHE WAS IN BED WITH GRAMPS.

GLORIA WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY AS SHE WAS HAVING A GANGOVER.

PLEASE EXCUSE BRENDA. SHE HAS BEEN SICK AND UNDER THE DOCTOR.

MARYANN WAS ABSENT DECEMBER 11-16, BECAUSE SHE HAD A FEVER, SORE THROAT, HEADACHE AND UPSET STOMACH. HER SISTER WAS ALSO SICK, FEVER AND SORE THROAT, HER BROTHER HAD A LOW GRADE FEVER AND ACHED ALL OVER. I WASN'T THE BEST EITHER, SORE THROAT AND FEVER. THERE MUST BE SOMETHING GOING AR OUND, HER FATHER EVEN GOT HOT LAST NIGHT.

PEACEANDGUITARS ________________________________________________

Most of us ave worked that out. Welcome to the real world! Best therapy is to play your guitar.Its Friday go out get waysted and pull a member of the opposite/same sex deppending on your orientation!!!!!!!! Dont wallow in self pity. Positive happy people only please............

ZINC MASTER ________________________________________________

Mate of mine works on the emergency switchboard. In the UK you dial 999 for the police or an ambulance. My mate answered this call from some idiot wanting the Police becauss his Pizza was late.

You should check out an English comic called Jasper Carrot. He does a routine with motor insurance claim forms. People have to describe the accident in their own words

IE.The accident was caused by me waving to the person I hit last time!

The lampost was obscured by human beings!

7 Everyday Therapies for Cabin Fever Combat cabin fever with these fun, meditative activities.

Feeling a little blue? Getting out of a winter-induced funk can be a challenge, which is why we put together this list of unusual "therapies" to rejuvenate your spirit and soul.

PART ONE OF TWO

1. Tap into your creativity.

Creative arts therapies, like painting and drawing, have been shown to boost immunity in HIV/AIDS patients, and they've proven a positive outlet for patients in psychiatric rehab and adults dealing with bereavement. If it's good enough for professional therapy, it might just help you too. "A new hobby gives you something you can focus your energy on," says Raymond Crowel, PsyD, vice president of the National Mental Health Association. "It can also help inspire you and lift your sadness," he says. So, you're thinking, you're no Picasso. No problem! Put paintbrush to canvas and just go for it. No one has to see your handiwork; it's just for you, babe.

2. Embrace your green thumb.

Gardening is a great way to combine a sense of control and calm. It takes your mind off of your woes and directs it toward something productive and beautiful. You don't have to have a huge plot of land, either; even the narrow strip of dirt bordering your apartment building will do. Or try container gardening -- just repotting your existing plants can bring out your nurturing instincts and give you a sense of accomplishment. If you're planting flowers, choose colors to create the right mood -- soothing pastels or celebratory reds and oranges. If you're partial to greenery, choose plants that have tranquil textures like ferns. You might even find that the regular task of watering can be a meditative act. Then, just sit back and watch your garden grow!

3. Foster or adopt a pet.

"A lot of people recommend pets to help with depression," Dr. Crowel says. "It gives you something to focus your emotions on in a positive way," he says. Pets literally bring more life into your life and increase your energy. After all, who can be down about a few lousy pounds or a missed workout when you've got a happy-all-the-time fluffy creature anxiously awaiting you when you come home at night? Of course, getting a pet is a serious commitment, especially a dog or cat. Starting a fish aquarium is a lower-maintenance alternative, and studies have shown that the simple act of watching the fish swim around can have relaxing effects. If you're not sure about getting a pet full-time, volunteer with an animal shelter to foster a dog or cat that needs nurturing before it's ready for adoption.

4. Have more sex.

7 Everyday Therapies for Cabin Fever

PART TWO

5. Exercise.

Traditional exercise increases endorphins and energy levels too. What kind of exercise? It could be anything that gets you moving. "People don't have to think about changing their lives," Dr. Crowel says. Try a different sport like snowshoeing, which burns a surprising number of calories and adds the element of a new challenge. Try a long walk, a challenging yoga class, or just get back on that treadmill. "Start with small goals," Dr. Crowel suggests. Otherwise, you might feel like you've failed before you begin.

6. Sample new music.

Do you feel like dancing when Madonna comes on? Do you get into your happy place when Bob Marley sings of love and peace? Excellent. Get yourself to the music store or get online and browse for music with similar upbeat rhythms. Try out a new artist or a new CD from an artist that makes you smile. "Playing music you like can be rewarding and can energize people," Dr. Crowel says. Just avoid anything too mellow or melancholy. We don't want any wallowing.

7. Take some quiet time for you.

peaceandguitars

All kidding aside - you having a bad day or something?

Hrh Fish

I have heard of similar stories (calling police about late food) from over here too.

EVERYBODY SHOULD B APPY COS YOU ONLY GET ONE LIFE. ITS EITHER RELATIONSHIPS OR MONEY THAT GET YOU DOWN. iF YOU FIND YOURSELF DOWN JUST MAKE SOME SILLY NOISES THAT USUALLY DOES THE TRICK.....

Zinc, loved the excuse notes....too funny!! :D

PS214, It's about damn time!!! I'm happy for ya!!

DoTheStu, it's funny...I called up the local bookstore yesterday and they DIDN'T have the magazine, neither did my favorite guitar store....but lo and behold, went to the grocery store on my way home (Albertson's) and there it was!! So start calling around, I bet you find it! And the price of the mag....well, I NEED to get a subscription!! Hope ya find it!

Suzie, I'm okay, thanks for asking...had a bit of a job change in January, so struggling to keep my nose above water and learn more new stuff. I have to cram the new stuff somewhere in my brain without any old stuff leaking out....THAT'S the hard part, lol!!!

Good Morning Satchland..... Cloudy, Grey and Cold in Chicago. That's why I enjoyed the beautiful morning a couple a days ago. Depressing......I'll survive......lol...... Speaking of Depressing......

peaceandguitars...... I concur with Zinc....What's up?

Zinc......I loved the jokes from yesterday.Sorry....I forgot to mention it yesterday.

Spizazz......Good to see you again. Thanks for your comments. I was a little taken back by that ....thanks just the same. Ovation 1 doesn't have to pass on what you said...I read the posts everyday...lol..... I have the band up and running again. We're playing The Lunar Brewing Co. in Villa Park on March 11th. Please try and make it, I'd love to meet you. Also Rory's in Addison has changed owners and it's called Legends now. We'll be there in April. Check out my site for more info and updates. http://www.thebluesmavericks.com

Mari......I hope everything is OK. I'm a little concerned. Please email me with updates. Always Hugs for you.

gotta have joe......Man,be careful out there. How are you feeling today? Is everything OK? Hugs to you.

Hey everybody, what's up?

Just wanted to drop in and say hi... I see the tour has been announced... rock on!!

What else is new?

And for those who have asked, my CD will be released February 21st... details to follow. Thanks again for the support guys!

hey Joe, how are you? im doing better today. which is good.lol. still a little weak though:(. I am so excited about the tour, but im also still nervous though, hehe. Any way just saying hi, hope you have a great day. love ya. huggss to you and the family:)

Keniko: Im doing better today. But my dad wants me to go up to the mountain again:(...i want to but i still dont have the energy to. lol. Huggss to you and yours:)

Rob:Thanks! How are you today?

How is every one else?

cheese101 & Keniko

keniko

Going to the House of Blues for the concert?

cuthbert1776

Ahh - come on - you can make Chicago on a Wednesday night.

962 That's another reason why I like Paul Gilbert so much, just his unbelievable talent ->guitars ->Laney Amp. He's another guy I gotta see live or meet, I need to see him play live, one of the best guitarists ever. I've been listening to 'Second Heat' a lot lately, I played 'Gone Too Far' maybe about 20 times yesterday, and everytime I had to go back on the CD player and listen to the solo over and over and over...his sweeping during that solo is beyond anybody else. If you want to hear one of the most amazing solos you'd ever hear, listen to 'Gone Too Far'. 1:40 into that song starts with the wildest sweep I've EVER heard! If you don't have 2nd Heat, you need it, such an amazing album! Don't even get me started with 'Scarified'! Yea, if you don't have 2nd Heat, you might want to get it...now.

cuthbert1776

There is a time change to take into account.

The show starts at 6:30 - maybe 3-5 hour concert (including breaks in sets).

That is 9:30 to 11:30 pm - then a 3 hour drive back. You be home some just after midnight.