wolf2
6365 posts total | IP Logged
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Hey man im not really doing to much cant remember how long i have been going out with her long time though even took my mom to meet her and stuffoh shes cool if your me and her anyways it gives me style cop chic,s listen joe tell me what you think i keep working out right at every diffrenent increment of weight i make sure it,s holding then when it is i give it more bicycle cool! it gives me perspective man like it,s realy all the same amount of muscle but it,s all smooth out into my body like nice with still the same amount of power cool hey sometimes it,s hard after so much working out ,weight,sman to bicycle but i let it catch it,s groove anyways later wolf2 killed a few birds with that stone later wolf2.i wonder what muscle house tink,s later wolf2.
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Fri Aug 3 '07 4:47:28 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank Scotland, Barcelona Spain Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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i just scored a new job today in archaeology.I was lookin for a teaching post in music college but this poped up instead, i start mon hoorah
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Fri Aug 3 '07 4:48:53 am
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gruskada
364 posts total | IP Logged
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webmaster - ok, thanks for clearing that up (I misunderstood that you misunderstood...). BTW, I ended up not needing a lot of the Super Colossal and Is There Love In Space? podcasts, but I can email you the full transcriptions if you want to use them for anything. I've also got a normalized database of all of Joe's songs cross-referenced with albums in MySQL and MSSQL formats if you would want to use either of those for anything.
slanshroom - congrats!!
daimer - I assume you can read this? http://www.guitars.ru/05/info.php?z787 If so, I'll send you a few bucks if you want to transcribe it for me.
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Fri Aug 3 '07 5:26:11 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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What is Butt Dust?
What is Butt Dust?
What, you ask, is "Butt Dust"? Read on and you'll
discover the joy in a
child's sincere originality. No adults in this!!
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding
his new baby sister.
after a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two?
Is one for hot and
one for cold milk?"
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was.
Granny replied she was
so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said,
"If you don't
remember you must look in the back of your
panties. Mine say five to six
."
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good
night. "I love you so much
that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my
bedroom window."
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain
killer. She tried in
vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her
frustration, her Mom
explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have
to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How
does it know it's
me?"
SUSAN(age 4) was drinking juice when she got the
hiccups. "Please don't
give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my
teeth cough."
DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and
asked: "How much do I
cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that
were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes
off them, he asked his
dad: "Why is he whispering in her mouth?"
CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking
worried. When his Mom asked
what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
what'll happen with
this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit
in?"
JAMES(age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His
dad read: "The man
named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out
of the city but his
wife looked back and was turned to salt."
Concerned, James asked: "What
happened to the flea?"
TAMMY(age 4) was with her mother when they met an
elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her
for a while and then
asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget....
this particular Sunday
sermon.."Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms
extended toward
heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face.
"Without you, we are
but dust..." He would have continued but at that
moment my very obedient
daughter who was listening leaned over to me and
asked quite audibly in
her shrill little four year old girl voice, "Mom,
what is butt dust?"
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:16:17 am
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cheese101
3965 posts total | IP Logged
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slansh....oooooo archaeology!!!! That's one of the things I always wanted to do when I was growing up....still want to, LOL!! Congratulations dude, don't get too hot, too dusty...and go find a gad damn treasure!!! :)
Gee axeshredder, my comment wasn't meant to be rude, just asking an honest question....but your private message to me was full of name-calling, viciousness and nastiness. Too bad you felt the need to act like that...winning passes to this show is such a priviledge and should be treated with more respect.
Travel safe.
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:19:01 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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Toilet Cleaning Instructions:
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of
pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry
him towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet
and close both lids.
You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds.
Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the
cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This
provides a "power-wash" and rinse".
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be
sure that there are no people between the bathroom
and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and
quickly lift both lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak
through the bathroom, and run outside where he will
dry himself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling
clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:19:52 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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Sunday Morning Relations
I will never hear church bells ringing again without
smiling..
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just
passed away, Katie went straight to her
grandparent's house to visit her 95-year-old
grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her
grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, He
had a heart attack while we were making love on
Sunday morning."
Horrified, Katie told her
grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old
having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago,
realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best
time to do it was when the church bells would start
to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow
and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the
Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd
still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come
along."
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:22:39 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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Definitions Not in Dictionary
ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends
and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born
and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in
conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.
INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the
paper.
MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of
today.
YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.
and MY Personal Favorite!!
WRINKLES:
Something other people have. I have character
lines
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:25:46 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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The Horse and The Chicken
On the farm lived a chicken and a horse,
both of whom loved to play together.
One day the two were playing, when the horse fell
into a bog and began to sink.
Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the
chicken to go get the farmer for help!
Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at
the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer,
but to no avail, for he had gone to town with the
only tractor.
Running around, the chicken spied the farmer's new
Harley.
Finding the keys in the ignition, the chicken sped
off with a length of rope hoping he still had time
to save his friend's life.
Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy,
to see the chicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and
he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the
chicken tossed to him.
After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the
farmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward
and, with the aid of the powerful bike , rescued the
horse!
Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to
the farmhouse, and the farmer was none the wiser
when he returned.
The friendship between the two animals was cemented:
Best Buddies, Best Pals.
A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit,
and soon, he too, began to sink and cried out to the
horse to save his life!
The horse thought a moment, walked over, and
straddled the large puddle.
Looking ! underneath, he told the chicken to grab
his hangy-down thing and he would then lift him out
of the pit
The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled
him up and out, saving his life.
The moral of the story? (yep, you betcha, there IS a
moral!)
"When You're Hung Like A Horse, You Don't Need A
Harley To Pick Up Chicks"
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 6:29 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:28:54 am
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michelle
8476 posts total | IP Logged
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well ya know T, people don't like to get busted in their own ignorance. I like the part where axeshredder said to you -
"you rude ass comment shows your complete jealousy...i cant afford to fly to california?....screw you bitch...you coulnt afford tomake me an offer i would except..you should really get a life intead of spending it on the satriani board...i did this to not only offer it to a fan you loves joes music like i do and make the whole trip free because it will cost 1000...i prefer to spend my money on other things that i dont need to explain to some wannabe....for your information im bringing a friend of the internet i never even met that lives in california...your lucky i dont enbarass your ass on that board but in repect to Joe, i wont...HA I will be at Joes greatest performance ever "
That's my favorite part :)
edit:
lemme just add that he could have just said you had it all wrong and misunderstood his post - but he went there....so I went there.
I got no beef with anybody and i could care less who does what, but some things just don't roll off as easily as others.
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 6:48 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:44:36 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank Scotland, Barcelona Spain Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Cube:Y have mail bro
Gruskada:Thx Dave
Captain Steve:thx bro it is harder work, which i happen t love cuz y get all muscled up in 2 weeks flat BUT MORE IMPORTANT there is respect for the workers in Archaeology!!!!!!!!!
T be honest the only thing i hate about the job in construction is the lack of that respect.Every day your life is on the line, not enough safety measures taken, it takes balls t do that work here for dark companys that keep the laundry basket clean if y understand? Yup 2 for 1 n look out swiss bank, nuff said.
Bro i respect the team, because some paid in full recently with life 5 people not so long ago t be straight, for some punk boss that loved t sniff snow, look out immigrants!!!
Work doesnt scare me cappy, its who i work for that does.I can only say i,m happy t be out that pic for a while n please god keep the sun on the back cause sure as shit this man is RED in a day lol
Cheese:Pass the sunscreen hon
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 6:53 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:50:47 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
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101 Reasons Women Prefer Cucumbers To Men
Part 1 of 2
1. The average cucumber is at least 6 inches long.
2. Cucumbers stay hard for a week.
3. Cucumbers won't tell you size doesn't count.
4. Cucumbers don't get too excited.
5. Cucumbers never suffer from performance anxiety.
6. Cucumbers are easy to pick up.
7. You can fondle a cucumber in a supermarket.... and you
know how firm it is before you take it home.
8. Cucumbers can get away any weekend.
9. With a cucumber you can get a single room.... and you
won't have to check-in as Mrs. Cucumber.
10. A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.
11. You can go to a movie with a cucumber.... and see the movie.
12. You can go to a drive-in with a cucumber.... and you can stay in the front seat.
13. With a cucumber you can always wait until you get home.
14. A cucumber won't eat all the popcorn.... or send you out for Milk Duds.
15. A cucumber won't drag you to a John Wayne Film Festival.
16. A cucumber won't ask: "Am I the first?".
17. A cucumber doesn't care if you're a virgin.
18. Cucumbers won't tell other cucumbers you're a virgin.
19. Cucumbers won't tell anyone you're not a virgin anymore.
20. With a cucumber you don't have to be a virgin more than
once.
21. Cucumbers can handle rejection.
22. Cucumbers won't pout if you have a headache.
23. Cucumbers won't care what time of the month it is.
24. Cucumbers never want to get it on when your nails are wet.
25. Cucumbers won't give it up for Lent.
26. With a cucumber you never have to say you're sorry.
27. Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
...want to shake hands and be friends.
28. ...say, "I'll call you a cab".
29. ...tell you he's not the marrying kind.
30. ...tell you he is the marrying kind.
31. ...call his ex-wife or therapist.
32. ...take you to confession.
33. Cucumbers don't leave you wondering for a month.
34. Cucumbers won't make you go to the drugstore.
35. Cucumbers won't tell you a vasectomy will ruin it for
them.
36. A cucumber a day keeps the OB-GYN away.
37. A cucumber won't work your crossword with ink.
38. A cucumber isn't allergic to your cat.
39. With a cucumber you don't have to play Florence
Nightingale during the Flu season.
40. Cucumbers never answer your phone or borrow your car.
41. A cucumber won't eat all your food or drink all your liquor.
42. A cucumber doesn't turn your bathroom into a library.
43. A cucumber won't go through your medicine chest.
44. A cucumber doesn't use your toothbrush, roll-on, or hairspray.
45. Cucumbers won't leave hair on the sink or a ring in the tub.
46. Cucumbers won't write your name and number on the men's room wall.
47. Cucumbers don't have sex hangups.
48. Cucumbers won't make you wear kinky clothes or go to bed with your boots on.
49. Cucumbers aren't into rope & leather, talking dirty, or swinging with fruits & nuts.
50. You can have as many cucumbers as you can handle.
51. You can eat cucumbers when you feel like it.
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 6:57 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:56:27 am
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Zinc Master
Zinc Master Crown Point, IN USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged
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101 Reasons Women Prefer Cucumbers To Men
Part 2
52. Cucumbers never need a round of applause.
53. Cucumbers won't ask: "Am I the best? How was it? Did you come? How many times?"
54. Cucumbers aren't jealous of your Gynecologist, Ski Instructor, or Hair Dresser.
55. A cucumber won't want to join your sports group.
56. A cucumber never wants to improve your mind.
57. Cucumbers aren't into meaningful conversations.
58. Cucumbers won't ask about your Last Lover.... or speculate about your next one.
59. A cucumber will never make a scene because there are other cucumbers in the refrigerator.
60. A cucumber won't mind hiding in the refrigerator when your mother is over.
61. No matter how old you are, you can always get a fresh cucumber.
62. Cucumbers don't leave whisker burns, fall asleep on your chest, or drool on the pillow.
63. A cucumber won't give you a hickey.
64. Cucumbers can stay up ALL night.... and you won't have to sleep on the wet spot.
65. Cucumbers don't leave dirty shorts on the floor.
66. A cucumber never forgets to flush the toilet.
67. A cucumber doesn't flush the toilet while you are taking a shower.
68. With a cucumber, the toilet seat is always the way you left it.
69. Cucumbers don't compare you to a center fold.
70. Cucumbers don't count to 10.
71. Cucumbers don't tell you they liked you better with long hair.
72. A cucumber will never leave you ...
...for another woman.
73. ...for another man.
74. ...for another cucumber.
75. A cucumber will never call and say "I have to work late, Honey", and then come home smelling like another woman.
76. A cucumber never snaps your bra, pinches your butt, or gives you a snuggy.
77. You always know where a cucumber has been.
78. A cucumber never has to call "the wife".
79. Cucumbers never have mid-life crises.
80. A cucumber won't leave you for a cheerleader or an ex-nun.
81. Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves.
82. You won't find out later that your cucumber ...
...is married.
83. ...is on penicillin.
84. ...likes you - but loves your brother.
85. A cucumber doesn't have softball practice on the day you move.
86. Cucumbers never tell you what they did on R&R.
87. A cucumber won't ask for a promotion just when you're
up for a promotion.
88. Cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do.
89. Cucumbers won't wear a leisure suit to your office Christmas party.
90. A cucumber won't leave town on New Year's Eve.
91. A cucumber won't take you to disco and dump you for a flashy outfit.
92. Cucumbers never want to take you home to mom.
93. A cucumber doesn't care if you always spent the holidays with your family.
94. A cucumber won't ask to be put through Med School.
95. A cucumber won't tell you he's outgrown you intellectually.
96. Cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers.
97. Cucumbers don't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy".
98. A cucumber won't insist the little cukes be raised Catholic, Jewish, or Orthodox Vegetarian.
99. It's easy to drop a cucumber.
100. A cucumber will never contest a divorce, demand a property settlement, or seek custody of anything.
101. No matter how you slice it, you can have your cuke and eat it too.
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 6:58 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:56:47 am
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Suzie2000
Suzo London, England Plays: Guitar (35 years)
2002 posts total | IP Logged
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Zinc- lol at the horse joke:)
Slanshroom- Hi- great news on the new job! My sister is into archaeology, but sadly hasn't been too lucky getting work on a dig since leaving University. Hope it goes well! :)
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Fri Aug 3 '07 6:58:18 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank Scotland, Barcelona Spain Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Suzie 2000:Post me her CV hon, i can pass it on, y never know & hey have a great time in France with ol Zen n J!
cucumbers, BAH, long n thin goes 2 far in, Short n thick does the trick....go North girlies go North lmao, either that or go black bwahaha
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 7:09 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:02:59 am
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Suzie2000
Suzo London, England Plays: Guitar (35 years)
2002 posts total | IP Logged
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Roy- will pass that on:) Very relaxing down here... Fred is in the middle of arranging all his pedals and gear for playing ths evening:) I'm going to try and film them playing a bit later, will e-mail you the youtube link once we get home and put it on there next week... I hope!
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:08:12 am
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Keniko
Ken Erickson Addison, IL. U.S.A. Plays: Guitar (54 years)
1532 posts total | IP Logged
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Good Morning Satchland.......How Are We Today????
It's HOT ! ! ! HOT ! ! ! HOT ! ! ! in Chi-Town.....95 yesterday....WHEW ! ! ! ! I hate AC (perfer open widows) but its a neccessary evil.
on non..... Hey.....I'm doing great. Our band is giging three weekends in a row starting tommorow. I can't wait to hit the stage. How are you? Everything Kuul?
Webmaster Jon......Thanks for the info. Like always you're on top of your sh.. ! ! ! ! Take Care......
Cheese......I see you saw. I see you saw???? Sing that a couple of times in a row ....sounds like a fecking nursery rhyme....lol.....How do you miss Joe's expression. Awesome vid. Hugs....
Have A GReat Day Everyone ! ! ! ! !
Now,onna count of three.....One,Two, Three.....I see you saw , I see you saw......
Edit....zinc...... Nice cucumber joke. I must be a cucumber cuz there's some peculiar simularities...lol.....Kids Jokes...Brittney....my fav....How does it know it's me? Priceless
Slans....I must have a some Black in me ? This is great. What I've realized today is .....I'm a Black cucumber???? I thought you guys were my friends....lol.....
GOD Help Me ........
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 7:26 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:12:05 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank Scotland, Barcelona Spain Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Kenico:But the Q is have y heard the Steve Gains tape? lol polly not, its theeeee best party tape!!!!!! just play the mutha
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:15:36 am
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wolf2
6365 posts total | IP Logged
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basicall the three hairstylist i go to are back together now,anyways i use to always get wash and cut right for about 3 years then i started going to magicuts right,! and they were selling me packages for my hair man no shit! i was saving almost 700 dollars a year man anyways my hairstylist said that we didnt realy need to do it now man she,s already found control basically and that it will ruin my rgular treatments with my dandruff shampoo i asked her that she said this shit will strip the dandruff shampoo even make it so that after it cant penetrate so we dont nut,s hey thats all i was thinking about later wolf2 have to do my hair soon man later wolf2.
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:22:51 am
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jblaze1
643 posts total | IP Logged
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Chinese Proverbs:
Virginity like bubble,one prick,all gone.
Man who run from car get tired.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Foolish man give wife grand piano,wise man give upright organ.
Man who walk thru airport turnstile sideways always going to Bangkok.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
Man who eat many Prunes get good run for money.
Baseball is wrong.Man with four balls cannot walk.
Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth.
War does not determine who is right,war determine who is left.
Wife who put husband in dog house soon find husband in cathouse.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It takes many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like Hell bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fish in other mans well often get crabs.
Man who fart in church sit on own pew.
Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
Edited Fri Aug 3 '07 7:31 am
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Fri Aug 3 '07 7:25:44 am
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