A boy and his grandpa are out fishing one day.Grandpa pulls out a bottle of Jack Daniels to take a swig and the boy asks "Grandpa can have a sip?"Grandpa responds "Well son,can your d*ck touch your ass?"The boy says "No" and Grandpa tells him he can't have a drink.

Then Grandpa pulls out a cigar and the boy again asks "Grandpa can try that?"Grandpa again asks "Can your d*ck touch your ass"?"No" the boy says and once again Grandpa tells he can't try some.

I been through Dublin, then right across land to Galway, great country,but expensive.i suppose anywhere in the world now you have to be careful travelling.dont want to sound to pessimistic mind. seems like every rock bands reforming of late, is it a good thing Extreme are back?

Slan : hum.. i fear the iMac is too much old.. i work currently with the sequencer Ardour.. it's free but far to be the top.

Hey Joe,

Damn, that sounds like a good name for a tune.....lol.

Was hoping to see you @ the Chicago gtr Center on the 5th of April. When we arrived the line was already a block long outsie the store. So we went and had a Beer.OK, maybe 3 at the bar across the street.Dang CUBS game was getting out and traffic was shi*! By the time we got out, well I don't think we would'vr gotten in the store when 1st arriving anyways. Arrrgghhh ! Nxt time, please hit the Riviera. A bit more room...... jk.................Not!

I just brought a pic of my son ,and a guitar pic for ya to sign. The pic of my son I took when he was bout 6 mnths old and he was a spitting image of you. Mini Joe. lol Photo was taken right b4 you shaved yer head ,and I laughed when I saw the pic. he had on shades n all ,and not much hair.

Anyways, thnx 4 all the GREAT Music and keep on Rockin! Hope t meet U some day. P.S. I was wondering how U were going to fit "Professor Satchafunkis" on my gtr pick? Also , Love my JS Peavy amp ! Tone Dude...Tone!

Hey everyone!

I just got off Planet Waves after ordering the UP IN FLAMES STRAP!!! I'm pumped! THEN, I went to Amazon and ordered NOTE, TM, and EOC, completing my Satch collection ENTIRELY. Yeeesssssss...

I was expecting weeks...they're expecting DAYS.

hey joe & satch fans! i just had a revelation.

i just moved to Israel from Chicago. yea. well i am so lucky that my next door neighbor is a really big Hendrix a SRV fan.ha

he was showing me stuff on U-tube and it dawned on me. why doesn't Joe play with some unknown guitarist? (G3)well, some people who are in the know in chicago know who Melvin Taylor is. He is also a big Hendrix fan who plays a fusion of jazz and blues. forget buckethead O.K.

Joe....

I have heard you say several times in the past that you don't think your acoustic playing is "up to par" or where you'd like it to be....and that in order to really get "good" on the acoustic you'd have to spend much time just playing that and set aside the electric guitar for awhile....

Well......

I just wanted to say to you, and this is my opinion, I'm no expert but my heart knows what it loves....

That you did a beautiful job on the acoustic opening of Andalusia...I can't imagine you improving on that, it was gorgeous. Bravo Joe....I would love to hear more acoustic from you in the future. Not for you to give up the electric for any length of time, as this is proof that you can play acoustic with soul and let beautiful music pour through your fingers no matter what type of guitar you're working on. You've already "got it" Joe....in my humble opinion of course. I know you need to feel comfortable with it.

I just wanted to tell you that Joe....to me you've already "arrived" acoustically and I'd love to hear more....well, I love just about anything you care to share :)

This one goes out to Zinc Master...

A Russian and a Newfoundland wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold medal. Before the final match, the Newfie wrestler's trainer came to him and said, "Now, don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this 'pretzel' hold he has. Whatever you do, do not let him get you in that hold! If he does, you're finished." The Newfie nodded in acknowledgment. As the match started, the Newfie and the Russian circled each other several times, looking for an opening. All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the Newfie and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost. He couldn't watch the inevitable happen. Suddenly, there was a scream, then a cheer from the crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to watch the Russian go flying up in the air. His back hit the mat with a thud and the Newfoundlander collapsed on top of him making the pin and winning the match. The trainer was astounded. When he finally got his wrestler alone, He asked, "How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!" The wrestler answered "Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of testicles right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could." So the trainer exclaimed, "That's what finished him off!" "Not really. You'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own nuts."

p.s. thanks for that IRS joke!

Right, so after learning that I cannot go to the Satch concert in Brisbane, I've decided to hit up the Sydney concert. I'm also planning to buy the premium tickets so I can see Joe before le show, and p'raps get him to sign my gat, that would just make my day.

So, I'm wondering, Has anyone on T2J brought in a pretty big item (such as a guitar) to one of his concerts and had it safely stored at the venue. I realise it's impossible to garuntee safe keeping of any item, but I'm just trying to figure things out, and any info/help would be great.

Satch Lessons?

I currently have the opportunity to take lessons online by one of the greats at the moment, and was hoping that Joe would consider something like this, because in my book he is definitely the master of all in the are of guitar...Maybe post a new lesson video every month, or a few a month, or whatever...share the knowledge, and pass it on Joe!!!

ROCK!!!

El Nicko.....first of all, buy your platinum ticket early...like now....to be sure you get one as there are only so many to be sold....

Then call the venue and ask them what could be done about storing your guitar for you. You will meet with Joe before the show so can easily carry it in there at that time....and usually they have you exit the venue for a bit before show time and line up outside near the entrance, then let you back in when doors officially open. Platinum peoples get to go in first. So maybe after you have your meet and greet with Joe and spend the hour with him before the show, and then have to go wait outside, you maybe could lock your guitar in the trunk of your car? Or at coat check....or possibly even the souvenir guy, if his area is really secure...

Thanks, cheese101, your info was incredibly helpful. Unfortunately it appears that one can no longer buy premium tickets for the concert. Horribly disappointing as I was looking forward to shaking Joe's hand.