Satriella
Satriella Walker
Sudbury, Suffolk
United Kingdom
1783 posts total | IP Logged
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Slanshroom - What do you mean you are working on me?
I can't feel anything?
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A city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little girl named Mary stopped beside him on her new shiny bike.
"Nice bike" the cop said "did Santa bring it to you?"
"Yep," the little girl said, "he sure did!"
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $20 ticket for a safety violation, saying "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it."
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, "Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?"
"Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop.
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the dick goes underneath the horse, not on top."
LMHO!!!!
Edited Wed Nov 12 '08 5:11 am
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:03:06 am
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Satriella
Satriella Walker
Sudbury, Suffolk
United Kingdom
1783 posts total | IP Logged
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Things That Are Difficult to Say When You're Drunk
Innovative
Preliminary
Proliferation
Cinnamon
Things That Are VERY Difficult to Say When You're Drunk
Specificity
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder
Transubstantiate
Things That Are Downright IMPOSSIBLE to Say When You're Drunk
Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you.
Nope, no more booze for me.
Sorry, but you're not really my type.
No kebab for me, thank you.
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?
I'm not interested in fighting you.
Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing.
No, I wont make any attempt to dance thanks, I have zero co-ordination.
Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to urinate over the nearest cash machine or shop front.
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:10:28 am
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Two Shay
2755 posts total | IP Logged
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Shroomboy - I wish I had a pint for every time some witty person has called me Captain Bird's Eye or Captain Pugwash. I'd be pissed as a fart for the rest of my natural!
Satchiella,
Some of my changes to peeps nicks.......
Monterrey Trace, Conch (AKA Michellica), Coffee Man, Comic monkey, Shroomboy, er Satchiella, Misty Angel, M le Zen Poisson, C Her Butt, Clarkus Maximus, Thoroughly Golden Millie, Cubic Death Man
Edited Wed Nov 12 '08 5:33 am
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:23:09 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank
Scotland, Barcelona
Spain
Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Cappy:lol which makes ya a prime pub target after a few
Satriella:Y cant feel anything?? surely yer box aint that big.Hope yer 2nd name isnt Burke Sandy! Blue Moon oooh Baz i,m drippin i,m drippin me love buckets on fire bwahaha
Edited Wed Nov 12 '08 6:02 am
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:30:37 am
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Two Shay
2755 posts total | IP Logged
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Slan - You wouldn't believe just how many numbskulls that to this day think they are the first one to come out with such a comment. I've had over thirty years of the feckers and still they think i'm laughing along with them when i'm really thinking "TWAT!!!" LOL
Edited Wed Nov 12 '08 5:42 am
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:41:28 am
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Satriella
Satriella Walker
Sudbury, Suffolk
United Kingdom
1783 posts total | IP Logged
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Captain Stevicus - Oh right on.....good changes....Satchiella it is then!
Slanshroom - ??????? you lost me....what are you working on again....obviously an on-going thing?
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The updated birds and bees story for all those new parents out there.....
Little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers: "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway. Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a blessed little Pop-Up appeared and said: You've Got Male.
Edited Wed Nov 12 '08 5:59 am
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Wed Nov 12 '08 5:57:25 am
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aussiefudd
Big Bad Wah-bit swayer
New Lambton, NSW
Australia
Plays: Guitar (39 years)
484 posts total | IP Logged
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SkippyGirl: another Aussie here......
I mainly lurk in the background, I'm always here keeping myself amused and entertained with a cast of thousands....
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Wed Nov 12 '08 6:52:28 am
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aussiefudd
Big Bad Wah-bit swayer
New Lambton, NSW
Australia
Plays: Guitar (39 years)
484 posts total | IP Logged
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Definitions not in the dictionary
ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.
INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES:
Something other people have. I have character lines
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Wed Nov 12 '08 7:12:10 am
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gotta have Joe
Kayla Whitham
Butte, Mt
USA
Plays: Guitar (19 years)
2241 posts total | IP Logged
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im jeleous that everyone gets to see Joe....
I wanna see Joe but he isnt playing ANYWHERE near me. :(
I wish i could fly somewhere like you guys do
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Wed Nov 12 '08 7:47:20 am
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wolf2
6365 posts total | IP Logged
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Hello!.... well,my basement is a masterpiece .Earlier I went downstairs cleaned off my york 2001 gym man the lat leg curl and tricep cable gym set it up ,so now when you go downstairs to the basement their,s alittle table with some tools on it and engine oil then my York 2001 then to the side from their is my weider frree weight room bench press barbells curl bars dumbell buddy this workout I will be doing after I get my filling my,3 Filling,s actualy will be one from ten years ago man buddy it make,s you feel unbelievable like health wise all my workout weight,s etc is all made in Canada excet my free spirit dumbells their china and my incline decline bench press bench it,s from china nice stuff though this thing not only will make me stronger the most diffinitve but look even better ,besides I need some triceps mom goe,s to work at the library today around 2 pm so I will just be listenint to the radio cant workout until filling need 4 new bolt,s for my gym well their not necessary but sort of have to wait until my canadian mental health associtaion worker come,s up on tuesday to go to the hardwar store the one intow the building center doesnt have the right bolts not for this aplication anyways later wolf2 hot stuffs shcneider my mom brought me home grocerys yesterday scheniders hot stuff are amzaing their on sale somewhere and so is schneiders lunchmate stackable for a dollar their like real super heavy duty nutritious man later wolf2.the perfect basement no?
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Wed Nov 12 '08 9:05:27 am
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slanshroom
roy marchbank
Scotland, Barcelona
Spain
Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Cube>In all respect, i get the impression Kaylas situation is none 2 simple, if i,m not mistaken jobs are as rare as hens teeth round her parts
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Wed Nov 12 '08 10:01:15 am
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joey joe joe
Sean Lombardo
San Diego, CA
US
Plays: Guitar (39 years)
2 posts total | IP Logged
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Hi Joe,
I was so pleased to meet you last night at Guitar Trader in San Diego. Thank you so much for having those types of events. Thanks for drawing on my JS100 again and signing your pic for my son James. Picture is already framed and on his wall.
I am so blown away by your sincerity and humble demeanor in person. Thank you for being exactly who you are. With no radio support, your fan base is still strong and more coherent than ever.
Your music has enriched my life so very much.
Have a great show tonight.
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Wed Nov 12 '08 10:44:08 am
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Do The Stu
Austin Lewis, III
Costa Mesa, CA
United States
Plays: Bass (25 years)
4067 posts total | IP Logged
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I'm leaving for my first of four Satch gigs in just a little bit. If anyone reading this will be at the show tonight, please say hi. It's always nice to meet new people. :-)
I'll post some kind of VERY brief review here when I get back. For some of the other shows, though, it'll be a few days before I'm near a computer and can post my thoughts.
Anyway...
...Austin...
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Wed Nov 12 '08 12:09:34 pm
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Igneousiceman
Is Satchurated Vox JS-DS #009473
UK
Plays: Guitar (18 years)
567 posts total | IP Logged
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maritime: Wow, I absolutely love Thomas Blug, he's just so...well, fresh. Trouble is he's always over in Deutschland, never over here...
gotta have joe: I know exactly how you feel, I missed Joe when he was about 30 miiles away from me. But I don't milk that story looking for sympathy =(...Look on the bright side, at least we have Podcasts!!!! =D
Listening to: Headaches and Heartbrakes by Joe Bonamassa
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Wed Nov 12 '08 12:14:36 pm
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slanshroom
roy marchbank
Scotland, Barcelona
Spain
Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
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Santachiella:I want my first Ibeenhad "Ibanez" for christmas & 2 weeks off t annoy everyone on you tube n tell them all how much they suck at playing
I want a JS1200 n a JSPeavey amp with that sexy Vox Satch pedal 2
If y dont gimme yer fired....yours spoilt bollox
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Wed Nov 12 '08 12:34:49 pm
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Skippygirl
2103 posts total | IP Logged
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Roo and MJS99 - great to hear from you, there has to be more of us surely?
You two look like serious guitar players - can you share your stories with me? I have seen your website, Roo, pretty cool.
Austin - probably a dumb question but how do you know who receives the afershow passes? Are you part of that process?
Listening to Addition Creations and the self-titled on the way into work this morning.
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Wed Nov 12 '08 7:04:28 pm
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Slimeshred
kristofferson sanchez
leyte, Isabel
Philippines
Plays: Guitar (31 years)
1 post total | IP Logged
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Hello Joe..:)
Thanks for the amazing talent you share to us.
From Philippines..
Kristofferson Sanchez
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Wed Nov 12 '08 7:18:11 pm
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