Maritime:Yup makes sense, i really need to be able to write without an instrument.I find playing an instrument distracts from what i,m trying t get out my head, the sound of pencil on paper sounds much more appealing, even tho i get it at times i need t speed the process up instead of spending countless hours pointlessly noodling around until something sticks or recording 1000s of ideas i,ll never use.I guess i,m after honesty

Not alot of info but sounds Kool.

From Michaels Website..


HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!
POSTED: 12.13.2008

Whew, is it Holiday season again already?? I hope all of you had a great year and are ready to finish it off in grand style!! First, I want to wish everyone out there "Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year"!! Party hard, but party safe.

Second, I want to update you on the status of "Chickenfoot." Chad and I just got back this week from recording in the San Francisco area, and I am pleased to say that the basic tracks are finished and smokin'!! Right now Joe is sprinkling some guitar magic on everything, and next week Sam will be doing vocals. Then I'll be back up there to slather some backround vocals on everything. I can't wait for all of you to check it out!! Look out 2009!!!!! Take care, and I'll see ya soon....Michael

tee hee hee....seems like I got competition...

Ibanez_god - Rabbit...er..Wabbit...snake....LOL

Maritime - Bedridden...cringeworthy yet funny at the same time hehe

Tuesdayschild - hope your mum laughs!

Skippygirl - hung out to dry....LOL

Wonder if they are cheering Joe Satriani up?

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I've learned that... the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned that... when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned that... just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day.

I've learned that... having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned that... being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned that... you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned that... opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned that... when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned that... one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned that... a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned that... I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.

I've learned that... when your newly born child holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned that... everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

I've learned that... it is best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it is requested and when it is a life threatening situation.

I've learned that... the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

-------------------------------------------------

Farmer Jones got out of his car and while heading for his friend's door, noticed a pig with a wooden leg. His curiosity roused, he ask, "Fred, how'd that pig get a wooden leg?"

"Well Michael, that's a mighty special pig! A while back a wild boar attacked me while I was walking in the woods. That pig there came a runnin', went after that boar and chased him away. Saved my life!"

"And the boar tore up his leg?"

"No he was fine after that. But a bit later we had that fire. Started in the shed up against the barn. Well, that ole pig started squealin' like he was stuck, woke us up, and 'fore we got out here, the darn thing had herded the other animals out of the barn and saved 'em all!"

"So that's when he hurt his leg, huh, Fred?"

"No, Michael. He was a might winded, though. When my tractor hit a rock and rolled down the hill into the pond I was knocked clean out. When I came to, that pig had dove into the pond and dragged me out 'fore I drowned. Sure did save my life."

"And that was when he hurt his leg?"

"Oh no, he was fine. Cleaned him up, too."

"OK, Fred. So just tell me. How did he get the wooden leg?"

"Well", the farmer tells him, "A pig like that, you don't want to eat all at once."

No one likes Mondays.

Anyone who does like Mondays are soulless undead or managers and therefore don't count.

Never ask anyone how they are doing on Monday.

Everyone is allowed to complain on Mondays.

Never try to complete an urgent task on Monday. If it finds out you'll be sorry.

If Monday's got you marked, you're done for.

No one ever beats Monday. Ever.

Somehow there always seem to be more Mondays than Fridays.

On Mondays, it's always your fault, and there is no way to fix it.

Anything that was just a slight irritation on Friday always grows to an unbearable vexation by Monday.

Calling in sick on Monday only means more trouble on Tuesday. Mondays cannot be avoided.

Monday will never forget what you're due.

If Monday were a person it would be a crazed traffic cop. Not really evil, just too powerful, and highly vindictive.

Knowing that Monday morning is coming has a way of ruining Sunday nights.

Tuesday is one of my favorite days only because it's the point at which Monday is the farthest away.

If you did anything useful on Friday, you will have to do it over on Monday.

Monday loves to see you sweat.

In many places Monday is considered and dirty word and shouldn't be used in polite company.

Monday should never be approached with out coffee.

Feel free to add your own revelations.

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A husband wrote the following letter for his wife and left it on the dining room table: To My Dear Wife,

You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel.

Please don't be upset - I shall be home before midnight.

When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the dining room table:

My Dear Husband,

I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 54 years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old. As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference: 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18!!!

Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow.

Label Instructions...

On an American Airlines packet of nuts Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts

On a Japanese food processor Not to be used for the other use

On a Swedish chain saw Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands

On German headphones Do not increase volume past threshold of pain

On Sainsbury's peanuts Contains nuts

On Sears hairdryer Do not use while sleeping

On a bag of Fritos You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap

On some Swanson frozen dinners Serving suggestions: Defrost

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box) Do not turn upside down

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding Product will be hot after heating

On packaging for a Rowenta iron Do not iron clothes on body

On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication

On Nytol Sleep Aid Warning: May cause drowsiness

On most brands of Christmas lights For indoor or outdoor use only

On a child's Superman costume Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly

On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid Do not use on food

On a bottle of ALL laundry detergent Remove clothing before distributing in washing machine

On a packet of Sunmaid raisins Why not try tossing over your favourite breakfast cereal?

On V-tech phone Electronics, like people, sometimes get confused

-------------

THESE ARE TAKEN FROM REAL CVs AND COVERING LETTERS

"I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms."

"Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details."

"Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year."

"Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions."

"Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave."

"Failed bar exam with relatively high grades."

"It's best for employers that I not work with people."

"Let's meet, so you can 'ooh' and 'aah' over my experience."

"I was working for my mom until she decided to move."

"Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No commitments."

"I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."

"I am loyal to my employer at all costs. Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail."

"My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."

"I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant."

"Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far."

"Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store."

"Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job."

"Marital status: often. Children: various."

"The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers."

"Finished eighth in my class of ten."

"References: none. I've left a path of destruction behind me."

ah the weather is so nice here roy, better than the rain wind and cold at home! clear blue sunny skies is nice

runin outa minutes as usual... jsu a quich hello ;)

I've been listening to this guy for some time now, and in all that time, I have never thought to check him out on You Tube. It was about time I changed that... I found one of my fav's and had to share. Nick Harper - The Kilty Stone.

Hi All - I am a zillion posts behind and have other stuff to post but for now, please can I ask form some good vibes for my cat?

She's suddenly developed something and I'm well worried. Been given a steroid to hopefully pick her up but the vet was adamant she's too old to be operated on : (

So if your prayers will help I'll take them please

I know there are worse things, but she's alway been a family member to me

Joe, You've been a huge inspiration to me in the past and I'll always be a huge fan. I checked out the comparison of your tune and Coldplay's, and while the chord progression is the same, the whole song isn't the same. I wish you luck, but also this might be a wake up call for you - If your songs are sounding like Coldplay material, then maybe it's time to get back to some heavier material!

And that is what I'm begging of you now - to do some more "metal" sounding stuff, or heavy, or whatever you want to call it. Your last cd really bummed me out because it's nothing like you're capable of. I can't listen to it because it's just too whimpy.

Like I said though, I'll always be a fan. I just wish you'd switch things up a bit every once in a while. Check out the new solo cd's from Marty Friedman and Jeff Loomis. Songs can be heavy and still have good melody to them!

slansh

Scottish milk straight from the teat?