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Blue_Moon
Alan McKenna
Dublin
Ireland
Plays: Guitar (23 years)
6317 posts total | IP Logged
laaaaaaaaadyyyyyyyy innnnnnnnnnnnnn reeeeeeeeeeeeeed
Tue Nov 24 '09 4:11:34 am Set this message as last read

joe satriiani

27 posts total | IP Logged

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow.

It was addressed, ' Dad.' With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.

Dear, Dad.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing to you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns caravan in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love,

Your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table.

Call when it is safe for me to come home.

Tue Nov 24 '09 5:07:19 am Set this message as last read

slanshroom
roy marchbank
Scotland, Barcelona
Spain
Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
theres nobody heeeere....not even Al.....* Slan tiptoes off with JS1200*
Tue Nov 24 '09 5:47:33 am Set this message as last read

Donkey Hotay

3984 posts total | IP Logged
My one and only sis suffers from MS and has suffered greatly the last say 5 years. She is feeling very upbeat and optimistic that something can be done very soon thanks to THIS great news!!!
Tue Nov 24 '09 5:57:39 am Set this message as last read

slanshroom
roy marchbank
Scotland, Barcelona
Spain
Plays: Guitar (51 years)
3677 posts total | IP Logged
wow Mike that IS great news
Tue Nov 24 '09 6:15:27 am Set this message as last read

Mystical Robot
Chip
USA
Plays: Guitar (17 years)
147 posts total | IP Logged
mike thats great news. Someone I know has MS they will be happy to hear this. Thanks

Edited Tue Nov 24 '09 6:24 am
Tue Nov 24 '09 6:20:45 am Set this message as last read

McDave

Cook, MN

Plays: Guitar (40 years)
1830 posts total | IP Logged

Cripes ! Is this room full of lawyers and stockbrokers? Who has money for Donnies and other overly expensive equipment? That a lot of boxes of macaroni & cheese where I come from ;)

Dave Matthews Band....very talented musicians...but their music does absolutely nothing for me..

Tue Nov 24 '09 6:47:24 am Set this message as last read

Don1963

231 posts total | IP Logged

zinc; where do you find this stuff? good one again.

Axe; i know the band has the final say and i'm pretty sure people voting for their friends won't work, thats what makes it so funny! not sure what the band will pick. are they looking for the best quality, overall performance, or something different and more fun. the mrs. is looking for another site to post the rest of our vids. youtube won't take .avi uploads anymore. anyone got any suggestions? we still have a whole dvd worth of stuff to put up!

feel bad for you scubadaz.

blue is in love with his axe. i would be too!

Tue Nov 24 '09 7:30:17 am Set this message as last read

Zinc Master
Zinc Master
Crown Point, IN
USA
3563 posts total | IP Logged

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'

************ ********* ********* *

MALE PROCEDURE:

1.. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

###############################

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth!

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine..

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up...

6. Attempt to insert card into machine...

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8.. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt..

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone..

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27.. Release Parking Brake.

SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH,

AND TO THE LADIES who can handle it.... they need a laugh, too!

Remember this! A lady sent it to me.

She was laughing, too.

Tue Nov 24 '09 8:12:22 am Set this message as last read

bubbles
Sheila Brocato
Chandler, AZ
USA
Plays: Other (2024 years)
63 posts total | IP Logged
What are the, Ten Words? I ha e always wondered this. :)
Tue Nov 24 '09 8:49:40 am Set this message as last read

Do The Stu
Austin Lewis, III
Costa Mesa, CA
United States
Plays: Bass (25 years)
4067 posts total | IP Logged

In the words of Joe, from the Super Colossal podcast:

"And of course the ten words, that's up to you, that's part of the mystery...you will fill in the blanks for me."

Probably not the answer you were looking for, but there you go.

:-)

...Austin...

Tue Nov 24 '09 9:10:19 am Set this message as last read

Two Shay

2755 posts total | IP Logged
Can some clever clogs tell me how I can check all my previous posts (without trawling through hundreds of pages)
Tue Nov 24 '09 10:30:08 am Set this message as last read

Donkey Hotay

3984 posts total | IP Logged
Cappy, advanced search by nickname
Tue Nov 24 '09 10:44:05 am Set this message as last read

cheese101

3965 posts total | IP Logged
Orrrr, just under yer name where it says 1734 posts total, click on that....it gives u all yer own posts, all 1734 of em.....
Tue Nov 24 '09 11:13:19 am Set this message as last read

njbeast
David Wren
Manchester,
UK
Plays: Guitar (25 years)
700 posts total | IP Logged

Hey Peeps,

Hope you are all well?.

Dave

Tue Nov 24 '09 11:15:05 am Set this message as last read

Donkey Hotay

3984 posts total | IP Logged
Yes cheese, that is infinitely easier for a Cappy.... hmmm Cappy trawling.....
Tue Nov 24 '09 11:21:17 am Set this message as last read

Two Shay

2755 posts total | IP Logged
Thanx clever peeps.
Tue Nov 24 '09 11:30:24 am Set this message as last read

Two Shay

2755 posts total | IP Logged

Bubbles - As Do the Burgers pointed out from Joe.

I posted the following quite some time ago but here it is again just for you.

TEN WORDS

I’ve been a thinking lately

That I am so much in love with you

We been through it together baby

And we’ve seen our problems through

Now is the time for me to speak out

I’ve got ten words for you

Just – wanna – spend – the – rest – of – my – life – with – you

Just – wanna – spend – the – rest – of – my – life – with - you

I know it’s been a long time coming

And you’ve been real patient too

I may be hard to live with sometimes

But I’d give my life for you

Now is the time for me to say it

I’ve got ten words for you

Just – wanna – spend – the – rest – of – my – life – with - you

(Instrumental)

I’ve been a thinking lately

That I am so much in love with you

We been through it together baby

And we’ve seen our problems through

Now is the time for me to speak out

I’ve got ten words for you

Just – wanna – spend – the – rest – of – my – life – with – you

Just – wanna – spend – the – rest – of – my – life – with - you



Edited Tue Nov 24 '09 11:38 am

Tue Nov 24 '09 11:37:46 am Set this message as last read

wolf2

6365 posts total | IP Logged
what!?where the HELL! was I!?its full of oil my 250tnt dunfords of havelock ski-doo dealership on my ride open house thier tommorow 25 .00 a gallonmy oil injection is wright full of it at the openhouse price where the hell was i though brighton or something! more coffee tnt is stillwarm later wolf2.
Tue Nov 24 '09 12:58:18 pm Set this message as last read

michelle

8476 posts total | IP Logged

For M. London & McKenna

Tue Nov 24 '09 1:14:53 pm Set this message as last read

death cube k

6054 posts total | IP Logged
Um..... Thanks ...
Tue Nov 24 '09 1:37:10 pm Set this message as last read

pat the hat

2 posts total | IP Logged
Hi joe we came to see you at the sheperds bush 02 and had a great time it would be great if you could repeat the performance again in the u.k. perhaps at the international music show you know we will be there to see and hear you and the guy,s keep on rocking cheers pat the hat
Tue Nov 24 '09 1:58:45 pm Set this message as last read

Didierrrr
Didier Strijdonk
Hulst, Zeeland
The Netherlands
Plays: Guitar (21 years)
4 posts total | IP Logged

So back to the Coldplay copyright infringement case... I'm sure a lot of you must've heard the songs (If I Could Fly and Viva La Vida) mixed together. I'm not sure if I'm the only one, but I can't help but love them mixed together. So, what do you guys (and Joe, you too) think of this?

Some examples of what it could sound like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27syhPd08hw http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZc82ZKI2AU

I personally think the first one isn't mixed properly, but it's definitely the coolest of the two, because it still has the lyrics.

One last thing though: I really don't like the song Viva La Vida, but mixed with If I Could Fly it really sounds awesome. So please Satch, consider this. I'll send a message/mail to Coldplay too, so if they ask you about mixing the songs together, then it probably was me who brought them up with the idea.

I hope to be hearing some good news about this in the near future. In the mean while, keep up the good work with Chickenfoot! (although I'd like to see one last solo tour...)

Tue Nov 24 '09 2:25:23 pm Set this message as last read

Blue_Moon
Alan McKenna
Dublin
Ireland
Plays: Guitar (23 years)
6317 posts total | IP Logged
The summerwind

came blowing in

froma cross the sea


and don't encourage him M
Tue Nov 24 '09 2:35:16 pm Set this message as last read

JSblues1000

5 posts total | IP Logged
Spent a lot of time today testing distortion pedals...did a shoot out of all kinds of pedals including the satchurator.... well ... I like it the most... just as promised... its like Satriani in a tiny redbox... amazing!!! Thanks !!!
Tue Nov 24 '09 2:46:53 pm Set this message as last read
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