OH - Anyone who wants to order some of Joes stuff through Fanfire....

don't bother!!!!!!

I ordered a T-shirt on the 13th July...OK to go to India...

but it still hasn't got there and no refund in sight either!

Joe Satrini - yeah it was cool even without the head!

Bahduh - there is no problem with me and Growler as far as I know, OK so we have different opinions but that's life...no need to get het up about it.....we cool and still friends as far as I know....

OH speaking of Growler...

Hope I catch you in time... "Inside Looking Out" off of their "Live Album." ...thre is not much on them on the net...got a feeling this may be quite hard to get hold of....but I will try next time I am in a big town...thanks for that!.....why aren't there more bands with a stonkin bass...it has such a good sound!

Here is my new Joe picture...that makes 12 now...although not sure I like this one...maybe I should darken it up a little....haven't heard anything from Webmaster, Mick or Joe about the calender....hmmm what to do?

http://entertainment.webshots.com/photo/550119904/2913387410084221824fkCjhQ

SIGH....SO MANY QUESTIONS ASKED......JOE

LETS SEE SOME BLUE AGAIN!

alexandrecaetano - i think you have the longest nickname in here! awwww good news about the showcase.....Oh great advert and nice picture with Dave by the way....as Stevee said either imagine people naked or on the toilet in front of you and that should quash any nerves....lol...but I think you will just get carried away with your music and forget about anyone else anyway.....feel the music force!...hehe

aussieRGman - No its not good, i get emails pretty quick...like give it another week...and oh once its in DHLs hands we cant track it....yeah...rubbish....i deal with DHL every week so I know the score! grrrrr ....still I am sure they will be fine with your stuff.

962 - dont forget to tell me all about yer holiday!

Keniko - Oh I knew I forgot someone last time....sorry my friend....good news on the band front....are you doing new material or are you trying to teach the old dogs your tricks....hmmm i hope you have that saying otherwise it could sound bad....thank you for checking out the picture.

Oh gotta go...running late....see ya my friends..

Oh all those who haven't posted in a while....we miss you!

oh and come back!

Hugs Satriella xx

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh out o time.....

just time to say.....

HELLO TO ALL HUGS TO ALL GOODBYE TO ALL

WEBMASTER JON - HEY THIS LITTLE SECTION YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT.....WHY CAN'T IT JUST BE A FREE PAGE WHERE ANYONE CAN POST AN ARTICLE ON JOE RATHER THAN ONE PERSON LOOKING AFTER IT....HMMM I GUESS PEOPLE COULD PUT THE WRONG STUFF ON THEN EH?

Hey I went to this girls house yesterday, she has some fantastic instruments, a rel nice solid wood bass and a georgeous black acoustic guitar and a mega electric drum kit! .....oh and the sweetest lil puppy...called Ozzy...cross between a rockweiler and a boxer...hes so cute!!!!

Cheese101 - So you on Lovers bend in the cold....anyone there with you to snuggle up to?

joe Satrini - aaaaaaaaaagh no not that...please...not the (dun dun dun - dramatic music for effect) head!!!!!!!

lol don't worry, makes you dark and mysterious without it! hehehe

Dark Ripper - thats a hard one.....there are lots of questions like why does he feel that way, are you being unreasonable and playing it while he is trying to sleep....can you reason with him and agree to a specific time you can play....do you get much time to play it when he is not there....does he know how serious you are about your guitar...can you go somewhere else to play it? Is he likely to follow through on any threats? Why did he say that in the first place...was he just having a bad day?

alexandrecaetano - Please let us know how you got on?

Big Bunny - oh nearly a week gone by....are you pacing the floor now!....hope you get your Platinum ticket OK to!

Hugs to all

Satriella xx

Wow its a bit quiet round here...

well I got one thing to say to all you guys!

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NICE KNOWING YA

Oh and........

Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

hehehe...lol...thanks Slanshroom...you just made my day

JoeSatrini - oooooo the Stig....now that iiiiis dark and mysterious....and a bit hard to believe...a man....good at two things....driving and playing guitar.......I think I don't believe you!!!! lol

Zenfish - feast of beast....wow...now your talking!

JS_JS - oooo tell me more about Dragonforce...love em....I was gonna get tickets for my hubby and son but they were a bit worried that it would be a bit repetitive.....give us more details...please?!!

hugs and have a good weekend all!

Satriella xx

Having thought about this....if there were no more males...there would be no JOE...

hmmmmm

maybe we will keep you around for a bit then....

Emergency...Emergency...there is an emergency going on!!!

JOE, HAVE YOU EVER PICKED UP YOUR GUITAR AND FELT UN-INSPIRED TO DO ANYTHING...I MEAN JUST COULDN'T THINK OF WHAT TO DO...OR YOU KNOW PLAYED A FEW NOTES AND FELT NOTHING....OH HOW CAN I PUT IT LIKE WRITERS BLOCK FOR GUITARS....IF YOU HAVE HOW DO YOU GET IT BACK...

Oh who am I kidding Joe will never answer that!

OK EMERGENCY EMERGENCY...there is still and emergency going on....

Anybody else!!!!

Here is the deal I've lost the will to draw....whereas before I couldn't wait to pick up a pencil and get going on something...it's gone...so have you had that with your guitars.....I mean what do you do?

_____________________________________________

DelfinoPie - Welcome back!!! hmmm Stafford nice part of the country hope the move goes well!

Cheese101 - Congrats to yer mum and dad...thats good going!

Zenfish - hehe The fact that I like joe should have given you a clue as to the kind of music I like

oh oh

Anyone got the new Dream Theatre album yet? If so should I get it?

Speaking of Dream Theatre...on the album Images and Words...john Petrucci looks like Ross Geller...don't cha think (er just with longer hair obviously)

Lovely post as usual Iceman

why is it so quiet...where are

JOE!!!!!

Tulsachops
CroNumber9
gruskada
FabLawyer of SBM
Powerslave214
waterproof soap
civgeek
TheForgottenBoy
BADMAMAJAMA
Bahduh
Keniko
js1200js1000
Peaceandguitars
Growler
Slanshroom
Suzie
SteveeT
Spookey
Punkdude75
LucySorets
Do the Stu
PTRocker
Phyrdom
HrhFish
Cuthbert1776
mthead101
Anibur
DeathcubeK
MariMari
Ovation1
the_beatrix_kiddo
davealan
cosmic_ape
DC Slater
Guitarmiester
Captain Steve
donnie_darko

YOU ARE ALL MISSED!
GIVE US A POST...JUST A HELLO!

+88________ROCK~ON_!!!___________
_+880_____________________________
_++88_____________________________
_++88_____________________________
__+880_________________________++_
__+888________________________+88_
__++880______________________+88__
__++888_____+++88__________+++8__
__++8888__+++8880++88____+++88___
__+++8888+++8880++8888__++888____
___++888++8888+++888888++888_____
___++88++8888++8888888++888______
___++++++888888888888888888______
____++++++88888888888888888______
____++++++++000888888888888______
_____+++++++000088888888888______
______+++++++00088888888888______
_______+++++++088888888888_______
_______+++++++088888888888_______
________+++++++8888888888________
________+++++++0088888888________
________++++++0088888888_________

THATS FOR ALL!!!!

Hugs Satriella xx

Ahhhh Joe, now there is someone mysterious.....there are so many unanswered questions....BUT one question that is definitely answered...

THANKS JOE!

______________________________________________

Zenfish - Yeah actually you are right, I actually have a very wide spectrum of musical taste, but rock guitar is my favourite.

JS_JS - Sounds great, there is no way I would want to be up front though....I've seen what that's like....I actually like being a nice pinky colour...black and blue is just not me...lol....well done for surviving!

Joe Satrini - aka Stig - hmmmm I may need video proof of this doing two things at once lark.....OK I will stick on a Joe CD and look at my Dali book...thanks!

slanshroom - Lol hmm thanks that would at least inspire me to kick yer butt!!

BigBunny - Maybe its because I reached my goal of 12 Joes! I am sure you will have a good result....

deniell - play fast!.....be patient....a baby can't run a marathon....he has to learn to walk, then run, then train for quite a few years to be able to go 26 miles.....Joe has been playing and practicing for many years...you can't hurry it!

blue moon - figures!

Hugs Satriella xx

one for the guys..ooo..shakira shakira..

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8718728501056290731&q=genre%3Acomedy

wow this girl is amazing!

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/slalom-skating-p1.php

Big Bunny....you HAVE to see this!

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/rome-drawing-p1.php

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh this is soooooo funny

always look on the bright side of life/football....oh the last one will have you crying with laughter!!!! ahhhhhhhahahahahaha

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/footy-mistakes-p1.php

Is this what your dog is thinking?

1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all!

2. Yelling at me for barking... I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG!

3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly who's walk is this anyway?

4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!

5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo - what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.

7. Taking me to the vet for the "big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!

8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

9. Dog sweaters. Hello? Haven't you noticed the fur?

10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.

confused.com

Why english is a pain to learn

The bandage was wound around the wound.

The farm was used to produce produce.

The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of injections my jaw got number.

Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

This could be dangerous as you are mostly men...but hey...you gotta live dangerously sometimes...

Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?

A. Shoot him again.

Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung?

A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.

Q. Why do little boys whine?

A. Because they're practicing to be men.

Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him or Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.

Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?

A. Trustworthy.

Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?

A. Because not one will stop and ask directions.

Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?

A. To stop the snoring before it starts.

Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?

A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

Q: What is the difference between men and women..

A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Q: How does a man keep his youth?

A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY
It's not difficult to make a woman happy.
A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

JOE......HAD A DAY AT HOME YESTERDAY....SO I WAS LISTENING TO MOST OF YOUR ALBUMS...

BUT I THOUGHT ABOUT HOW WHEN YOU CHANGED MANAGEMENT AND TOOK A DIFFERENT TAKE ON THINGS YEARS AGO.....HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT I WANT TO TRY SOMETHING REALLY RADICALLY DIFFERENT AGAIN...NOT NECESSARILY CHANGE MANAGEMENT BUT JUST GO IN A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT DIRECTION MUSICALLY JUST TO SEE WHAT ITS LIKE....OR ARE YOU HAPPY JUST TO GO WITH THE FLOW OF INSPIRATION AND FOLLOW WHEREEVER IT LEADS?

Blue Moon - Yeah autistic people are fab.....most of the savants are autistic....if you didn't see the link I posted a few posts ago have a look...this guy is amazing he did a 75 minute helicopter flight above Rome and then he had 3 days to draw it on 5 yards of paper, and he was so accurate down to the columbs and sidestreets and everything!

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2006/rome-drawing-p1.php

FabLawyer of SBM - yay nice to see a familiar face,,,,er text....er welcome back!

that goes for you too

Cuthbert1776 - ACtually having seen this autistic guy (link above) draw Rome...welll I am quite inspired....and awed!

oh oh that goes for you too...

Guitarmiester - Yeah I like a bit of Dragonforce, but not too much, does get a bit repetitive on record but it would definitely be an experience to see them. But I would rather see Dream Theatre....I am getting into them more and more to be honest.....I will get the new album now I know your screamin on it somewhere! hehe Look forward to hearing your take on things from your own lil studio...cool!

Kayla - hey welcome back honey...hope all goes well next week!

yay....good to see some names that have been missing for a while welcome back all

962 - thanks for the clips, very nice, and a new guitar...hope you put some pics up on webshots soon!

illuminata - good to have you back!

mthead101 - I can't help thinking that a slam-a-tocious hug would be quite painful....lol....reminds me of wrestlers when they grab someone and slam em down on the ground...gulp!.....but I know you would never do that to me...hehe....er...I hope!

js1200js1000 - EH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ibanezplyr - Wednesday Monday????? Some parents just don't think do they!....I remember when in BA there was a Dr Doctor and Ty Ping Wong and Mun Chan Chew!

hmmmm there is one name missing from those who haven't been around for a while...

oh what's his name...

think...

think....

think......

oh yeah (light bulb!)

JOE SATRIANI!

Hugs to all Satriella xx

WEBMASTER JON - Thanks for all the info.....

Hugs Satriella

aussieRGman - Sorry to hear about the accident....yep as the bible says "time and unforeseen occurances befall us all!" ....you just don't know whats round the corner....hey your dad is very fit though to be doing any of that at his age...all hail to him!

Suzie2000 - hey good to see you back Suzie....how are you settling into the new job.....sorry to hear about the 15 year old...not a good start to the year for you or anyone else!

Bahduh - just gonna wait for my next bank statement and see if they have done anything!

and finally......

YAY.....CANT WAIT.....I'M SO EXCITED.....AT LAST SOMETHING TO GET HYPER ABOUT AGAIN!!!!!!!

...can't slow down now,
to where you are,
I feel like I'm flying,
here, in my car.

I just can't slow down!

You were flying, (not in a blue dream but in reality!)
you couldn't slow down....

get well RICHARD HAMMOND!

Hugs Satriella xx

Blimey Charlie....what a day yesterday....ever had one.....it was a good job I was in a good mood otherwise I would have been suicidal by the end of the day....first I am walking along in my stilletoes and the heel just virtually completely breaks off...so now I am walking along with each stride being either 2inches shorter or higher than the other.....

then....

I am out it a back road in the middle of nowhere....stop for a while...go back to my car and my tyre is completely flat and I have never changed or seen anyone change a tyre in my life....

then....

and this was the worse thing...my little guitar that hangs from my purse IS GONE!!!!!

oh and I fogot to tell you what happened the day before....I stopped at this farm with a friend who had never been there before....and its gone up market with a big new building since I last went and there is this photographer milling about, talking to the owner I presume...he takes a few pictures of the vegetables and then uneasily comes up to me and says " do you mind if I take your picture getting some mushrooms...its for the Guardian!"

haha how funny is that!

____________________________________________

Blue Moon - CD looks great!

Michelle - I think if we are crossing Cancer and Gemini then Blue Moon is a Mini-can (of lager or somesuch substance!)

Keniko - hope it’s a good ride in the saddle and you don't fall off again!

ovation1 - da house is doing fine but it could do with a standing ovation! Or a sitting ovation1...lol....welcome back

slanshroom - hey .....sorry to hear that at least a couple of your friends died....(or possibly their rellies...)...at least I think thats what you were saying....circled by death...doesn't sound good...whatever the situation.

tokyo jack - Hiya....you gotta be kidding....I am a babe when it comes to posting on this site...I only been here a year....some people have been here for year after year after year....but you'll see....once you start people are so friendly you just can't help but come here every day and have a lil post....are you from Tokyo?

Hey peeps! Quick look in.....hmm not much to see....

njbeast - Really...OK what happened on your last day like that....come on cheer me up!.....Oh not that I am down or anything.....its all gooooooooooood.....well except losing my guitar!!!!! boo hoo

so what happened?

Hey JOE ..... what about you...you ever have one of those days...where lots goes wrong?...oh and what happened...should you decide to answer

parubilu - hey I will help you say "please,Joe,come to Uruguay!!"

Hey JOE.....please go to Uruguay!

Lixard - yep I agree....Steve Vai's album of all the bits he did for films etc is great...it would be great to have the Nascar 06 music from Joe!

slanshroom - OK...not sure I understand what you just said...but as long as your OK...Oh and Whats your name? lol that was funny....I used to watch that...er Kung Fu that is when I was little!

tokyo jack - well thats a hard question to answer....I guess you would have to ask someone who has seen me!

haha.....just watched the wedding DVD from Poland.....now I see just how stupid my dancing really was!!! lol.....lol

hahahahaha.....oh thats funny!!!

Why do we loose all sense of street cred at a wedding...beats me!

Hugs to all Satriella xx

helloooooooo.....

where is everybody?

tumbleweed......

tumbleweed.....

silence.......

tumbleweed.........

whistle....whistle...whistle...

Ok OK heres something to get your brain working...

if I said.....heathcliffe

Claire....

Rudy.....

Theo.....

Denise......

Sandra.....

Oh and the middle kid...oh I can't remember her name??

Vanessa...that's it!

Remember them.....it was so great to watch them grow!

http://www.imdb.com/gallery/mptv/1367/Mptv/1367/10894_0096.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Cosby,%20Bill

My favourite American Actor / Comedian....

Bill Cosby!!!

Don't cha just wish he was yer dad!

I don't think I quite got his essence...

http://entertainment.webshots.com/photo/2475506660084221824dfXiEh

may have another go later....but still I love him to bits...wonder what he is doing now!

Joe Satrini - Wow I am impressed - that's never been attempted by any other male....3 things at once!....where's Norris?? never around when the real records are being attempted!....look forward to the video :-)

voodoochild04 - Oh that sucks slightly....still at least if he is your friend he will let you play it till you get your own!

parubilu - Hi....happy to help....although Joe doesn't get much say on where he is gigging I don't think...but it doesn't hurt to ask!

wolf2 - I was watching this think on the music channel the other day...the 50 most shocking moments in Rock....one of them was when the lead singer announced he was gay.....when i read it I thought... What are you talking about....then they showed the video...breaking the law.....and I thought.....well he hardly needed to announce it really...you only had to look at them....though I must admit although I used to be into all the heavy rock....from the Caroline Roadshow days....I didn't know that about Judas Priest!

Blue Moon - So when can us mere mortals buy your mini album then?

Keniko - I'm sending you good vibrations...your picking up exaltations.....good good good good vibrations.....oops sorry got carried away there for a minute...when are the pictures gonna be on yer new site....that's the important thing!....hehe

Kayla - Yep the acoustic question has been asked and answered!...hey good news for you that joe said if he wasn't a guitarist he would be a snowboard bum! Oh but bad news about your sister.....how did the meet up with you know who go????????? come on I am dying of curiosity here!!

Hugs Satriella xx

Wow next month I will have been here almost every day for a year!

JOE - YOU ARE DEFINITELY WITHOUT A DOUBT MY FAVOURITE MUSICIAN.....WHOSE YOUR FAVOURITE ACTOR?

Cheese101 – ouch gettingup at 5’s not good, but the scenery sounds lovely! Have a great holiday!

Blue Moon – Love the man in the rain cover myself....is it you?

Kayla - The trouble with skiing or snowboarding is your all covered up....so you may have already been boarding with Joe...you just didn't know it coz he was covered with thick clothes and goggles etc!.....lol

Bahduh - just got my statement and no refund as yet......grrrr

Sigh!

Im not well!

WHOA...GO JOE....GO JOE....!!!!!!

HUGS SATRIELLA XX

OCPS470 - Hey real nice site you got there....love the red guitar fading into the distance...very cool...

Darkness = Great track!!!

ohh no wait......

Stevie Ray Hendrix - Really great track...love that!

Oh flip...gotta go to work...

Well done & hugs