cheese101

When your new DVD arrives, let us know if it is worth getting. I noticed it is only 36 minutes long - and $18 bucks.

Paying 50 cents for every minute? Plus shipping.

If it is great - I will do it. If it is just ok - maybe not.

It is not what you think

Two women were playing golf when one teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men and he immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize "Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me," she told him.

"Oh, no, I'll be fine in a few minutes," the man replied.

He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help.

She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, "How does that feel?"

A bear walks into a bar and says “I want a bourbon and....a coke”, the bartender asks “what’s with the huge pause?”

The Who

For some President Bush comedy

check out

http://www.wimp.com/bushcomedy/

Apple rolls out new iPod home stereo box, Mac mini

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - Apple Computer Inc. (Nasdaq:AAPL - news) on Tuesday introduced a new iPod "Hi-Fi" home stereo system and a new Mac mini powered by an Intel (Nasdaq:INTC - news) chip the company said was nearly five times faster than the previous version,

Apple Chief Executive Steve Jobs said the iPod home stereo, which is not designed to be portable but is easy to carry, is compatible with all versions of the iPod. The machine sells for $349 and is available today.

"It's a home stereo reinvented for the iPod age," Jobs said.

The latest addition to the iPod family marks Apple's latest attempt to tighten its grip on the booming market for digital music machines.

Apple is far and away the leader in digital music players, with nearly 62 percent of the U.S. market for MP3 players in the fourth quarter of 2005, up from 52 percent in the year-earlier quarter, according to market research firm NPD Group.

Since the IPod's introduction in October 2001, Cupertino, California-based Apple has sold more than 42 million of the sleek devices, with about a third of that total coming in the fourth quarter of 2005. iPod sales accounted for 51 percent of the company's $5.75 billion in revenue in that quarter.

Apple also introduced on Tuesday a new Mac mini with a single core Intel chip as much as three times faster than the previous version. He also said the Mac mini with an even more powerful dual core Intel chip was nearly five times as fast as the previous version.

The Mac mini is Apple's entry level machine aimed at people who already have a computer or are thinking about replacing one because it is sold without a monitor, keyboard or mouse.

Jobs said the single core Mac mini sells for $599 while the machine with the dual core chip retails for $799. Both models are available today, Jobs said.

The new products come as Apple is moving its entire lineup of Macintosh notebook and desktop PCs and servers to Intel microprocessors by the end of 2006.

This is a true account recorded in the Police Log - Sarasota, Florida.

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her voice, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad.

The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned on her why. For the same reason she did not understand why, there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.

cuthbert1776

When I read the article, I thought it was from a tv show or that I heard about it before.

Keniko & cuthbert

All goes to show - we should BAN all couches - they are nearly death traps.

They severely injure innocent people and children every day fall off of them - sometimes getting hurt.

We should start here - with a petition to BAN all couches

or have a WAITING PERIOD before obtaining a couch

or if you want a couch - you have to sign a document releasing the seller from all liability

cuthbert1776

Good idea, start BANNING couches one type at a time, so that we, the good people of America, do not notice the big change all at once.

cuthbert1776

thanks for the cool links (dvd and giveaway).

Is someone running up their post numbers today?

Hrh Fish

cuthbert1776

Hrh Fish

No worries

Figured I would make a clear record.

I try to stay up on US history as well as world history - but not always successful. Can only do your best.

Got the munchies yet?

Hrh Fish

ahhhhh (tongue hanging out)

dips !!!!

New, More Colorful $10 Bill to Debut

WASHINGTON - Appropriate for the upcoming spring blooming season, your wallet is about to get more colorful. The newly redesigned $10 bill is going into circulation.

The new $10 — featuring shades of orange, yellow and red — will join colorized versions of the $20 bill and the $50 bill as the Bureau of Engraving and Printing attempts to stay one step ahead of counterfeiters and ever-more sophisticated copying machines.

Pearl Jam to release new album on May 2

Father asks his son, now aged 13, if he knows about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" the child said, bursting into tears.

Confused, the father asked his son what was wrong.

cuthbert1776

Our money is simply backed by the "good word" of the government. The government says it is good money, therefore we can accept it and use it.

cuthbert1776

I found his book at my local library - just requested it. When I have the chance I will try to read it.

michelle

There are a couple of rowdy t-shirts on that site -

cuthbert1776

The father of our banking system - Alexander Hamilton.

A man appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates.

Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.

Well, I can think of one thing," the man offered. "Once, on a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of high-testosterone bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen.

So, I approached the largest and most heavily-tattooed biker and smacked him on the head, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring and threw it on the ground." I yelled, "Now, back off biker boy or you'll answer to me!"

St. Peter was impressed. "When did this happen?"

'Charmed' a Casualty of WB-UPN Change

NEW YORK - The spell is broken. The witches on "Charmed" won't be making the move when the WB network combines forces with UPN to become the CW network in the fall.

A WB spokesman confirmed a TV Guide report on Friday that said the supernatural series, which stars Alyssa Milano, Rose McGowan and Holly Marie Combs, will end after eight seasons in May.

With "7th Heaven" having already announced its exit, it means that two WB long-running series won't move to the CW. The WB and UPN will both shut down in September.

The final episode of "Charmed" will air on May 21, TV Guide said.